a saturday

i wake up early dis morning, but after my breakfast i cont to sleep.. coz was too tired.. might be bcoz of the things i drank at henry's place.. makes me sleepy.. haha.. well.. and was back late yesterday coz have to fetch ai soon back to her hse.. so was tired the whole day.. in the afternoon, went out to do some shopping.. den pick my my laptop from the shop.. well.. its running perfectly now.. haha.. Thank God.. for new life.. haha..

anw.. was at the MBS graduation thingy.. coz uncle thin fook was graduating.. well.. he looks smart in that robe thingy wif the square hat.. well.. it shows u r graduating.. (lame).. anw.. will post the pic later on..

den after dat, went for the dinner.. well.. din really enjoy it, coz the food is not dat nice, the presentation is not up to par.. and u noe la.. haha.. din wanna share much bout it.. coz that makes me realise im actually in deep trouble.. haha..

anw, on my way back jus now, was somehow being kacau by uncle tee eng's children.. haha.. but its ok, a good clean fun anw.. jus dat not really in the mood of being kacau bcoz of wat had happen earlier.. haiz.. im worried actually.. did i spoiled her day by appearing there?? coz she might be very happy b4 i came.. but?? haiz.. is my fault..

anw.. got to rush to do some things for my class 2molo.. and the permission slip for camp..

Signning off
jOkEr

i thot she like blue?? well, maybe not..

weird..

sent my car for service dis morning.. well, waited from 8.30 to 11.30.. exactly 3 hours for my car to be service.. coz they dunno why go test drive my car for 2 rounds.. ya.. so waited there for dunno how long.. anw.. when i got back my car, it feels better.. i mean can drive faster.. more performance la.. maybe bcoz of the wheel allignment and balancing.. so it makes it better gua.. dunno la.. but it feels nice..

emo time.. anw.. din get any reply from her until 2day.. well.. haiz.. nvm la.. oledi biasa wif dat.. 2molo going to see her.. for some occations.. but, hope she wont feel angry when she see me.. coz like dat i rather not go den to go lo.. maybe last time i din care bout her feelings, now i do.. haha.. weird weird weird...

anw, wanted to post some pic but i forgot to bring my thumbdrive to college 2day.. so forget bout it la.. haha.. anw.. gtg d.. some jokers waited for me 1 hours jus to go for lunch.. haha.. anw.. ciao ciao

Signning off
jOkEr

when will she reply?? when??

not at home

hmm.. was not at home now.. was in my fren hse in subang writting dis post.. hehe.. jus finish playing badminton and now hanging out here.. hmm..

haiz.. until now she din reply my msg.. well.. it dosen really trouble me much now.. but jus still worried dat she is still angry.. jus dat..

haha.. feeling tired.. and whole body smelly, coz haven bath.. haha.. anw.. got thing much to blog now.. have fun ok??.. is a holiday...

Signning off
jOkEr

hmm.. i wonder did she ever read my blog.. maybe now no.. haiz.. hope she is fine the whole day 2day..

Emo time

well.. jus browsing through my other post and i realise dat most are them are emo.. hmm.. maybe i got no happy stuff to tok about.. haha.. nvm.. well.. got a more important things to blog today.. is about a boy.. yup.. his name is CALEB.. i dunno how old is he.. but, as young as him, has to go through such an operation, is really hard time for him, for he dunno anything.. to undergo something dat u dunno wats happening, is a very hard to go through.. i visited him yesterday, wif my parents, sawgot i think around 5 things poking inside him.. and he really do feel uncomfortable.. well, is very sad for him.. but thank God he got very patient parents, who really take good care of him, bring all his favorite pillow case, toys, and alot of other stuff to make him feel like home.. really really touching.. but there is something more touching.. the sunday skuls kids actually do some handcraft work and give it to him.. all his frens, classmate really do care for him.. the sunday skul teachers, give him card of encouragement.. well, i heard from uncle thin fook dat caleb ask him to read the card 3 rounds.. wow!!.. see how much those ppl care for him.. well, and i taken the photo of the cards and handcraft that the ppl write for him..

dunno why cant connect my phone to the college pc.. nvm.. will think of ways to put up the photos.. hehe

God teach me something yesterday.. or better words, reminds me.. He reminds me that he will not give me something dat i cannot bear.. coz if caleb can hold on through his pains at such a young age, we as young adults oso can bear through.. and of coz, God is there to help us.. when i nearly gave up yesterday on dat things, my sms kaki ask me how am i.. well, so i jus told her wat happen on monday.. well, she gave some very good advice.. den when i visited caleb, his strength in tahaning d pain, really touched me.. he is such a brave boy.. God really used dis 2 persons to tell me, to move on.. and specially wan to thank my sms kaki, though she wont read dis post, dat really thank her for her help.. well, she is d person who support my decisions.. haha.. thank u thank u..

now.. for the most emo part of this post.. i really hope she will understand watever things dat i did.. i've explained to her.. trying to make her understand.. but, things jus dosen worked out the way i wanted..

to those who are in a relationshop, i mean BGR(not building Godly relationship, althought u shud), pls try and understand wat ur partner are doing.. last time, i always ask her to understand my feelings, and all those things, but i nvr ever try to understand her.. thats why things got bad.. and i admit i nv try to put myself in her shoe.. i was very demanding.. haiz.. until now, i still nv think about her feelings.. all i did is to care about myself onli..

well.. i gtg now, class starting.. will post the photo later or on friday..

Signning off
jOkEr

things has gone better, but will these last?? i wonder.......

Am i feeling better?? Shud I change church??

Well, finally got an msg from her which she sounded angry.. ya, but nvm.. looks like is time to let go of stuff which i cant control.. hope everything will be fine when 2day is over.. i dun think i would want to msg her dis few days.. let her anger cool down 1st la..

i finished my 8am class early, so went wif those january intake ppl for "breakfast" at Kopitiam.. well, is good to noe more ppl rite.. ya, so was like chit chatting and my reputation nearly gone.. haha.. but it was fun toking wif them.. so ya, went for lecture after dat, and i nearly slept.. coz was too tired.. and she was boring.. so, trying very hard to pay attention in class.. but cant.. and my mind was full of that stuff.. so still trying to forget..

reuben come and find us during lunch time jus now.. ya, he is working like "mad" now.. haha a long time din see fren.. well, good fren i can say when me, him, neoh, leonard chua hang out most of the nite in subang doing stupid things.. well, dat was the past.. miss those 2 jokers.. haha..

holiday coming, but more assignment pilling up.. now is time for worrying.... haha.. hope i can let go all these stuff dat is going.. well.. thank God!!

dunno whether is there any CC dis week coz holiday.. if got, wish to bring my church worship team to go there for a visit.. coz they can observe how those ppl play..

was thinking bout some stuff in mind.. shud i change church?? i mean really, as i look at the things dat are happening around me, i somehow felt dissapointed.. not at them, but at myself.. the thing is, i cant actually communicate much wif dem now.. really praying very hard now.. maybe i shud wait till after chen wee come back from his back packing 1st.. i think the way i do things now is making most of the ppl around me feel mad at me.. maybe of the words i say or the things i do.. maybe my attitude.. basically, i dun think im actually "qualified" in being their teacher.. yup.. is jus me dat is being weird.. well.. i really dunno wat to do now.. feel like changing to HGC though.. a church that is started by ps ryan.. they ask me to visit dem, but until now cant find a suitable time to go there.. maybe one of dis week, will go there.. wat shud i do.. the things that are really holding me back from switching church is the "kam ching"(cantonese), the worship team, and TC.. dis 3 is really holding me in SWCC.. dunno la.. how will i handle this problems.. maybe i shud consult ps ryan, or calvin tay.. haiz..

well.. got presentation later.. better prepare soon.. and of coz, play my facebook 1st.. give some advice on the matter of changing church.. i really need alot of advice on dat..

signning off
jOkEr

wat can i do now?? i've pray.. i better pray more...

jOkeR

i was being a jerk for the whole nite yesterday.. well.. maybe bcoz of my new found attitude dat is so &&$% dat im jus so tired of being me.. maybe i did pissed someone off yesterday, and really, dun like d way i am now..

i somehow got an answer yesterday.. i dunno is dat d one, but, at least i know im in deep trouble.. weird case scenario.. din noe how to put it in words, but, feel so bad bout it..

Thank God dat i felt much more better 2day, den yesterday which i force myself to sleep so dat i dun have to think so many things.. now im jus worried bout one thing.. is she really mad at me now?? i msged her, but no reply.. wonder how is she..

din noe wat to write.. maybe i shud not write so long 2day.. but if things are really going the way i hope to, i hope, she will forgive me...

Well, is too early to tok bout bday's present for me, or wish.. but, if i get to choose, i choose to have a present that will make my thoughts/troubles/worriedness/jerk-attitude, go away.. dats the things i hope for.. i felt bad..

though u may not noe who am i writting about, jus wish to say sorry..

Signning off
jOkEr

Sorry for all the shit things i did to make u angry.. will u forgive??

more answers??

hmm.. cant concentrate well during class jus now.. my mind was wondering away, and i cant tahan the "jokes" dat my lecturer made.. it was quite funny, but, not for my mood today to laugh.. i kind of felt irritated by dat.. my mind was full of things, questions, dat i could not answer.. maybe not today.. but i hope, those answer will come to me asap.. really.. i really hope so..

was very quiet the whole day 2day.. lunch time, i almost bored Kiwi and Nicole to death.. coz both oso ask me why am i quiet.. but, nah, din really answer them.. jus dun feel like toking.. haih.. reason i blogged quite alot dis few days is bcoz there are things i really dunno who to tell.. there are problems, but as i scroll down my contacts on my phone, i could not find anyone suitable to tell of my problems.. and come to think of it, i dun really have any really close to heart frens where i can pour out my problems wif.. Jesus is there, but i cant really find anyone else.. maybe im not frenly enuf gua.. there is one sms kaki la, but if things get too personal, i really dunno who can i accountable wif.. haiz.. wat kind of fren am i.. real bad..

anw.. somehow do not feel like going back, coz once i reach back, thoughts will jus fill my minds.. but.. nah, no choice.. jus really pray dat i will get over those things fast enuf.. if God do not give me any answer, i hope He helped me forget it.. haha.. weird prayer..

gtg now.. tired of classes d.. began to feel sleepy.. dats it for 2day..

nitez
(although is onli 5pm)

Signning off
jOkEr

I really hope dat God will provide me a way out of this place..

answer??

For the whole day yesterday, which is a sunday, i was asking for some answers to some of my questions dat are really bugging me.. it has been really distract me from worshipping properly, from studying and many other things.. i realise dis few days, i have not been focusing on the things im suppose to do.. and that thought jus came into my mind most of the time.. i really hope i get an answer to those question asap.. sometimes i jus hope dat God will give me an answer directly den to give me hints here and there, coz i dunno is dat a hint or not oso.. haiz

i was sick the whole day on sat, after coming back from worship practice.. i got an severe headache.. i mean real bad.. yea, so i was jus lying down, trying to fall asleep.. den i jus thought of last time when i fall sick, dat person will jus be there to ask me to get well.. erm.. jus some normal things, but dunno why dat time i felt so special about it.. haih.. maybe is jus those time of happiness.. haiz.. too bad, time has gone...

on sunday, really played my best for worship, trying not to be distracted at all.. i think im the only musician is moving around.. haha.. coz, i boring if i jus stand there and play.. and yang keep changing his guitar here and then.. haha..

on my way to college, heard this song from Casting Crown, Voice Of Truth.. is a song which really reminds me of who am i listening to.. izzit the voice of the evil one, or the voice of God.. the evil one tells me dat i will fail, but God, tells a different story.. is a really nice song to hear, the lyrics jus struck me..

Was browsing through the photos taken by my phone.. well, pick some nice pic and post here..

This is my car key....

Hoc mun typing stuff into his laptop.. this is when we are having camp comm meeting

This belongs to my students.. kasihan the dog..

Dun ask me how they come out wif this.. anw.. dis are my teens....

gtg now.. class starting

after a tiring day

CC was awesome yesterday.. d worship was good, lots of new ppl came 2day.. but, one thing dat really impact me most is Elder's msg.. seriously.. when he say the sentence "let go of ur hurt, God has healed it", i felt is being directly speaking to me.. coz during pre-service prayer, i prayed dat God will help me go through these times (cant share here, but u all are allowed to guess), and i do not want all these things to distract my service to Him.. den suddenly God speak through Elder and the msg really speaks to me.. when i pray dat prayer, i began to feel more relax.. yes, the "hurt" can't straight away go, but i noe God is putting back my heart, and patching it up.. really thank God for dat.. THANK GOD..

after CC, rush of to play badminton.. had a great time there wif my classmate.. after dat, went for tea.. order this roti called, roti tampal.. is rotil canai wif an egg in the middle.. i wonder how they did it, it is not roti telur... is roti tampal.. haha.. den ask them wanna play dota or not.. den all play.. 4 of us.. wif our humilating losses.. haha.. though we lost, but, we had lots of fun joking around.. haha.. good frens... hehe.. den went of for dinner.. at least i noe the food at PINKEE was not bad actually.. haha.. i thot is bad at 1st, but after trying it, not bad la.. hehe..

yesterday reach home around 10pm after everything, den after doing my normal stuff, went to sleep at 11 something.. coz was too tired to do anything.. eheh..

dis morning, woke up, fetch my mum to work, was stuck at the sunway ldp toll for around 30 minutes.. i was like so dam pissed wif that toll.. joker la.. make's ppl life miserable.. haha.. thank God i got no class 2day, if not, will be late.. haha.. den came back, watch tv, 10 something, rush of to jo's hse to pass her the song for this sunday.. and im scared of her hse dogs.. they are scary.. maybe i got no "yuen" wif them.. see me den barked at me.. haiz.. sad case..

later going to play ping pong wif my class mates.. hope they dun fong my fei kei.. purposely come to play.. if not, will be sleeping at home.. hehe..

anw, gtg now.. now my muscle ache like nobody's business.. haha.. anw, began to like this song.. is "Lift Your Name Up" by planet shakers.. coz was playing dat song for CC yesterday too.. so, ya, here's the lyrics..

verse1
I'm gonna lift You up
Higher than all things
Above every name

Cause You are my God and King
You made everything
So I give You all my praise

pre-chorus
I'm gonna lift Your name up
So everyone can see You live in me

Chorus
Shine Your light in me
So all the world will see
The power of Your majesty
Jesus I will lift Your name up
Let Your Spirit fall on me
Now so that all the
World will know that You're my God
Jesus I will lift Your name up

Verse3
I'm so in love with You
Everything You do
Everything You say

You never let me go
You're always in control
And I give You all my praise

Bridge
Jesus I will liftYour name up
Higher than all other names
You are my God
You are my King
You are my


Dats all ppl..

Signning off
jOkEr

nothing to write

Dreams

Are dreams not true?? izzit dat dreams wont come true.. coz there is a pharse that says, " dream dat will come true, is not a dream". so is dat statement correct?? haiz.. really felt weird sometimes when i dream of something nice, it somehow wont happen.. haha.. nvm.. jus some weird emo kind of thinking.. anw.. dream of something nice yesterday.. i mean quite nice la.. haha..

anw.. was here early in college coz got meeting for our FA assignment.. well.. i have no idea coz i haven read the financial report yet.. nvm, will go wif the flow of the meeting.. so that ppl think as if i read it.. haha.. chun rite??

had the TC's teacher's meeting and we discuss bout things dat will be doing next year.. so was pouring my ideas.. well, hope it does help.. anw.. wat TC camp is one step closer to being done as we have one adult following us.. yes.. thank God for answered prayer.. now we have to pray for speaker and for campers.. and i believe if God wants us to have dis camp, he will surely provide.. Jehovah Jireh (do u noe wat he means).. read ur bible ppl!!!

i will be playing at CC service 2day.. on bass.. and dis song really keeps on plays in my mind yesterday and 2day.. the song is called.. "till i see u".. it was not a new songs, but the words really speaks to me.. let me see if i can find the lyrics..

Verse1
The greatest love that anyone could ever know
That overcame the cross and grave to find my soul
And till I see You face to face and grace amazing takes me home
I'll trust in You

Verse2
With all I am I'll live to see Your kingdom come
And in my heart I pray You'd let Your will be done
And till I see You face to face and grace amazing takes me home
I'll trust in You

Chorus
I will live to love You
I will live to bring You praise
I will live a child in awe of You

Verse3
You are a voice that called the universe to be
You are the whisper in my heart that speaks to me
And till I see You face to face and grace amazing takes me home
I'll trust in you

Bridge
You alone are God of all
You alone are worthy Lord
And with all I am my soul will bless Your name

Signning off
Joker

Where are u??