no more wishes...

well.. my wish totally blew up.. dunno shud i be sad bout it or wat.. but, din really wanna tok much bout it d.. its over... i guess...

at this moment, i kind of felt sad.. not sure why.. God really gave me a hard time to digest all of these stuff.. i tried, and tried, and tried..... but, there is ntg i can do.. i struggle, i prayed, i do watever i can... but life is like dat, u wont get all the things u want..

its the end 2molo.. i mean for the year.. and its like one year d.. we din tok very nicely for the past one year d.. everything changes.. i really dunno why do i still like her.. izzit really that i put too much feelings into dat relationship until i cannot pull myself up?? everyone says time can heal hurts, and feelings will lost.. but why am i still having dat stupid feelings in me??????!!!??? i really wanna let go.. i really wanna jus let it out.. at this present moment i had 3 assignments due in january.. and i have to go through lots of emotional struggles.. how la????!!!?!??!?!??!?!?

to tell the truth, i dun wanna enter into a new year wif this feelings.. but, looks like i have to......

anw, enuf of being emo.. Went to KLIA to sent Chen Wee off 2day.. well.. he left for new zealand for 6 months.. haha.. dunno why, but i felt emo too.. coz he is a fren, a teacher, a bandmate and a mentor to me... he left for holiday d.. dunno la.. well, he will be back... wif another person if possible.. hahaha...

but seeing someone important to the church left, is like, weird??? i dunno how to explain dat feeling.. is jus weird la..

i really dunno can i take up that position or not.. wif my heart too divided... i really wanna let it out.. but how??

WWJD, when face wif this situation???

I NEED AN ANSWER!!!!!!!!!!!!!

same day...

well.. got lots of wishes from my collegemate, church members, frens, high skul frens.. well.. i really appreciate it.. hehe.. thx alot once again..

i had a memorable bday 2day.. ppl celebrate their bday in malls, mamak, and other nice places.. but i celebrate my bday in church, cleaning up.. it was superb tiring.. haha.. but dunno why, i kind of enjoy it.. seeing everyone helping each other clean up the church, pouring out water from the baptism pool, vacuuming water(u actually can do dat).. shifting stuff from upstairs to down stairs.. and lots more.. really tired rite now..

but there is one more wish before the clocks hits 12... is too personal to write it here, but my cg gangsters shud noe wat i wish for.. haha.. if it is God's will.....

maybe i shud not hope for much.. i do had a fun time 2day.. thank u everyone.. especially my cg members.. u guys made my bday a memorable one.. especially dat "facial".. haha.. yang, can i have a pic on dat.. haha..

jus checked.. ntg.... maybe, nah.. nvm..

2molo will be my 1st day taking over chen wee's position as worship coordinator, pray dat God will guide me through.....

the day

went to teluk Gong yesterday for our cg outing.. it was fun.. eating and eating and eating.. one of the best seafood around town.. haha...

din really noe how to explain on wat happen dis morning at 12.. the whole bunch of ppl come to my hse wif a "bun" wif a candle.. i was like.. ok....... but im really happy.. haha.. though lots of stuff go through my face.. some weird "facial" on.. but it was fun.. haha.. though i din make it fun.. haha.. coz i was "cool" all the way... muahahahahaha...

but, wat i wish for 2day.. most likely wont come true.. i shall make the same wish again for next year... haha

1++ more days......

a day dat i've been waiting for one year... has finally arriving soon.. din noe wat to expect, so i will just wait..

watched a drama, dat episode is about this gurl coupleing wif another guy when her ex din treat her nice enuf, or like take her for granted like dat... so makes me thinks back on what happen last time.........

Christmas is the time when memories flashes back... sometimes, is jus so hard to let go when it keep coming to u...

The only hope i left now is God... Jesus Christ, which is the reason i live....

God, will U guide my way.. be the Light of my life...

Thank U God...

"Emo now, so will post other things dat happens 2day later..."

hay wire

haha.. Christmas eve service was not as good as i can think off.. the only thing dat was nice is the lightings.. dats the only thing nice.. i wont comment much on how the worship and drama thingy, coz it wasn't dat good.. i mean not them, but the small small technical stuff.. received alot of comments, good and not good.. but who cares.. its over, and im glad.. haha..

Things din go the way i wanted.. but, it was ok in some sense la.. we really need to practice more, and rehearsal more to get the feel of the things happening on dat day.. dats the thing i learn from all the mistakes i made..

slumber party was ok.. everyone was pretty tired after a long day.. so we slept at 4am.. after makan and some chit-chatting...

woke up at 11 something, watched cartoon network, went to uncle thin fook's hse for lunch, makan, sing song, and jus had meeting wif chen wee and chris for the worship ministry stuff..

Chen Wee is leaving soon.. well, i bet all of us will miss him.. though onli for 6 months.. haha.. he is a blessing for the church.. his talents is like WOW, and really, those times dat we come for jamming session at church on wed nite, that was the killer, bcoz of that, our skills improved..

anw.. those jokers will be going rbs 2molo.. hope they will experience God in a diff way.. haha..

ciaoing now, very tired, but dun think i will sleep.. the next question i had to ask myself again...

"wat to eat for dinner?"....

today is the day

well.. im feeling worried, exited, being sien(coz got 5 hrs break).. and many others mix feelings.. hmm.. dunno how 2nite will be?? hope it will be nice, and fun.. i hope.. haha..

well.. doing stupid things now.. i mean real stupid.. haha.. im feeling very the tired.. feel like sleeping d.. sure dat joker will put me to sleep in 20 minutes time.. haha..

anw..

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!!!!

Christmas Eve......

2molo is Christmas eve.. yup.. and i will be playing bass for worship, and sound guy, and lighting guy.. haha.. have to rush after class to church 2molo to set up..

dunno why.. i felt scared/worried.. is jus not me.. i kinda felt lonely.. serious.. my mood is not really dat happy.. felt drained out.. and many not good feelings.. well.. i really dunno how am i going to react 2molo.. if there is a wish that confirm can be fulfilled.... i wish..... she will really enjoy herself.. rmb last year, funny year.. but at least i had fun..

i really thank God.. i actually can biasa without smsing her every single day.. i thot i would be siao for this whole year.. but i actually made it.. i kinda felt relieve.. God really pull me through when im in need.. Thank God..

yupz.. i really kinda felt lonely now.. hope a miracle will happen.. haha.. but my personal hope normally wont come true..

Im going give my best 2molo....... I promise I will......

Taman Desa Waterpark

it was fantastic as i can say.. but din manage to play the most interesting part.. haiz.. sorry ppl.. and now.. kena sun burned.. painful la my face and shoulder.. ouch..

haha... well i dunno how to explain wat we did 2day.. but wat i can say is FUN.. we actually can start a story based on the shots dat jon took.. haha..

looks like no more GIG

well... i dun think i will be playing d.. coz Luke din update me on anything, and the person din call.. so i suppose no la.. but its ok.. at least i have time to rest more.. quite tired dis few days..

anw.. i bet grace and maggie will jumping up and down when they saw the match between MU and Liverpool.. haha.. coz MU won.. well, for me i think the shot was a "kai" shot.. haha.. nvm nvm.. den had a fun time in tax class jus now coz keep on ejek mr kumar bcoz liverpool lost.. muahahaha.. dats funny.. now i got kaki d.. Yvoone and Zheng De.. keep on making fun of him.. haha.. maybe im such a bad influence in class.. hehe

anw.. really got to type out my essay plan for my assignment, if not, IM DEAD!!!

Christmas

as wat henry said, when u're getting older, christmas is not as happening as it used to be.. well.. since a kid, i loved christmas, well, not really bcoz Jesus came down to earth.. but i was exited bcoz of the gift i will received from my parents, and from church.. haha.. but, as days past, i began to view christmas differently.. Christmas became more personal, more indept den present.. i began to feel more grateful to God of such gift that has given to us.. for now, i still do not have mood for christmas bcoz, a bz week coming ahead.. well, have to give my assignment draft to my lecturer, den meeting for the buddy system thingy in my college, my performance, practice for christmas 2 morning in a row, tc outing.. and others la, which i cant rmb.. was really tired of running around yesterday.. getting gifts for the teens..

anw.. back to christmas.. yea, it was not really exiting, coz i dun have any wishes dat i would want, or any gifts im looking forward to get.. the only thing dat really exiting is my performance on wed nite, if everything is as planned.. the only thing is of coz "Christ"mas.. well, we wont celebrate His bday if He is not born.. that is the only reason dat i wanna fully focus on.. last time is to attract someone, but now, got a different mindset..

anw.. i've been praying hard bout my future, as in where does God wanna place me in next few years.. I really dunno, as i cant envision how my future will be like.. so jus go with the flow..

haiz.. have to go listen to some lawyer about wat writing a will.. well, my dad is not around, so ask me to go listen.. haiz.. dunno for wat..

ciao

Joker

i look at ur smiling face again.. its nice.. but, is not me who can make u smile.. im gone...........